Not too long ago, I ran across a post on a dating blog, titled “Cheating at Online Dating.” Before you jump to conclusions, no: it isn’t what you think. It deals, interestingly enough, with keeping track of guys that interest you while not being obvious about it. It’s a post that gives new users of online dating services (Match in particular) information they might otherwise take a while to learn. I’m going to share part of her post and add a guy’s alternative point of view.

In her post, Kim (the author) leads into her tips with the following scenario:

” You’ve gone out with someone a few times and are really excited about him — so much so that you want to show him to a few friends and see what they think, re-read his details to make sure you’re not missing some major gaping flaw and — most importantly — see how often he’s cruising online… but you don’t want to seem like you’re obsessing, and you know that when you click on his profile, Match.com slaps your name onto his “Who’s Viewed Me” List, letting him know you’ve been studying him up…For part one in our occasional blog series teaching you how to cheat at the online dating game, here are a few simple tricks aimed at helping you figure out whether he’s still playing the field — without seeming like you’re keeping tabs.”

Kim’s article goes on to enumerate five techniques for viewing someone’s profile and/or online dating habits without him knowing. I’m not going to reiterate them here. Instead, I’m going to start by blowing the lid off the obvious, from a guy’s perspective. She’s chasing butterflies and letting the elephants get away. The three points below illustrate what I mean…

1. The only reason most men are likely to care whether or how closely you’re keeping track of them is if they’re interested. If “he” is into you, he’ll be flattered (at least) and knowing you’re keeping track may coax him closer. If he’s not into you, he’ll move on…usually sooner rather than later. Surreptitious oversight of his online cruising activities will not affect the outcome.

2. If you’ve gone out with someone “a few times” you have no presumption of exclusivity. He should still be looking and so should you. The possible exception to this is if, something has been said to lead both of you to believe you are now “an item”; in which case, my question would be, “then what are either of you still doing on line?” If you feel a desperate need to “check up” on him, you really ARE obsessing…by definition an unhealthy thing to do…unhealthy for YOU!

3. If you’ve been out a few times and you’re still checking out his profile to see if you’d “missed” something, there’s something wrong with your online dating paradigm. You meet someone in person after connecting online to determine whether his online persona matches his profile…not test your reading comprehension. If you’re really excited about him, spend more time with him. You’ll get a much more accurate picture of what an enduring relationship in any form with him would be like…certainly more so than is possible by re-reading his profile.

What all of the techniques in Kim’s post share in common is the assumption that subterfuge is either necessary or desirable in the online dating/meeting environment. Online dating is and always has been, a misnomer. It’s online meeting. You meet online and date offline. Your hope is that it will (eventually) lead to a mutually rewarding personal relationship…however you are inclined to define it at this point in your life. After you “connect” offline, you’re no longer doing online dating…you’re just dating.

Online dating/meeting offers undeniable advantages to busy women in the 21st Century and as such, it deserves every woman’s serious consideration as a means of meeting desirable men. But keeping track of a man’s online cruising activity after your first few “dates” may not tell as much him as you think. That’s always best assessed in person. Yes, you can figure out whether he’s still cruising, but the information by itself won’t tell you much about why. It may be as simple as not having turned off his email alerts when he’s been matched…which he may have set to daily before you met. Curiosity takes over and he checks it out of habit. After all, he’s still doing his assessment of you as a potential “main squeeze.” Watching that process unfold is a little like watching water boil. You can watch if you want, but it’s probably not the best use of your time.

Want to be your best, most attractive self to him? Be who you are and don’t hide your feelings. If you’re really that excited about him, make it exciting for him. This approach will always be more attractive than anxious circumspection about what he may be doing tonight…which doesn’t mean it will always work, but it gives you your best chance of success. Just my opinion. Am I missing something…?

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Is your guy cheating on you? How do you know that he’s cheating on you? Do you have daunting doubts that he’s cheating on you? You know, there’s something about men and cheating. One out of three men will cheat on their wives or partner. It’s written in the Ten Commandments that “thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife”. However, adultery has been around forever. It’s not men do not know the cheating is wrong; some have just the habit of doing it. Others find cheating as a good alternative of their happiness. They find that their marriage is not as happy as it used to be before.

As a woman, it hurts so badly if your man is cheating on you. If you have doubts that he’s cheating on you then you need to observe more. Here are some sign that your man is cheating on you.

1. A change in his personality.
Normally, your man doesn’t narrate how his day went unless asked. Suddenly, he narrates every bit of detail as to how his day went. That is some sudden change in his personality. That would be weird of him to tell everything. He’s probably done things and masked with his normal daily activities. Be very careful and take note of this sign as this usually comes first.

2. He changed his wardrobe and clothing style.
Normally, he wears denim and some shirt and now he’s dressed to kill. He’s wearing a tuxedo from a known designer. You ask him why he’s buying those clothes and he says it’s for business meetings. Doubt a little. Come to think of it this way, he has never worn a designer label before in his work.

3. His savings are slowly becoming smaller.
Normally, he shows you his bank account. Looking at it, you are secured knowing he’s saving for the rainy days. Now, you see that his savings are below the normal amount he puts in. This means he’s spending on some things. Take a look at your house if he has purchased some items. If there are none, you should have the benefit of the doubt. The guy’s spending money on his woman and not you.

4. You get a disconnected feeling.
You know there’s something wrong when he’s distant from you. There seems to be like a barrier among both of you. When you try being sweet to him, he cuts it off right away. Moreover, there are lesser conversations between the both of you. The dinner dates are lesser than the usual. That’s a deeper problem in your relationship that you should fix right away. If you just let it be and not do anything about it, infidelity can destroy your relationship

5. He doesn’t have sex with you.
Men are wired to have sex. Their testosterone level increases their sex drive. You put on some sexy lingerie and he doesn’t get turned on by it. He makes some silly excuses. He makes excuses like he’s too tired from work or he’s not in the mood. That’s a lot of crap. Men love sex.

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Traditionally, women marry men who are older than them. The reason were many, like economics, sexism etc. However, the major reason was maturity as many believe that women mature early with age and thus, the difference in the age makes up for the maturity.

It is said that people who have enthusiasm are attracted towards each other, no matter whatever their ages are. People in this relationship does not care whether there partner know how to drive, cook, mow the garden etc. They respect each other difference. Not only people are tolerant in such kind of relationship but they are supportive also.

The truth is that the older women younger men relationships are far more successful than what society believes and that is why younger males are seeking older women. The increasing population of women over 35 or 40, either due to divorce or lifestyle has made this kind of relationship more popular as unlike 30-40 years ago, these times there are many single older women.

Older women do not imply that they are dull or boring. In fact, they are sometimes more attractive, vibrant and young at heart than the younger ones. They have seen life and thus, have very good decision making and problem solving skills.

A young man falls for an older woman because he feels confidence with her. Older women are direct and honest and also they are in more control of their emotions and that is why they are considered to be a better lover. They even have more touch of sensuality thereby, making them more preferable.

Now you may ask why older women want younger males. Answer is simple. A muscular, toned body along with energy, enthusiasm and willingness to do the work is some of the characteristics of young males. Young males encourages accomplishments and do not feel threatened by them.

Well, the younger women feel that their older counterparts are given them tough competition and they do feel threatened by the changing dating scenario. However, there is still time for this kind of relationship to gain social acceptance.

Well, the younger women feel that their older counterparts are given them tough competition and they do feel threatened by the changing dating scenario. However, there is still time for this kind of relationship to gain social acceptance. If you are already in the agreement of older women young men then swing by to mingle with these hot cougars today for free.

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Secondly, include the things about you that are a bit below the surface. Most profiles are generic and speak nothing to who you actually are and what you enjoy as a person. Everyone enjoys spending time with friends and going to the beach. Tell about how you enjoy collecting shells and making necklaces or how you can’t live without wool socks.

Start off by listing 5-10 things about you that are unique to only you. Guys or girls passing by your profile need to see something that will make them want to stop. Long walks on the beach or enjoying a good glass of wine is not going to provoke interest.

Lastly, the worst thing you can do is throw up a profile just to complete one. Take a step back for a moment and find the qualities and characteristics unique to you. Think about the subtleties in life that make you intrinsically different and appealing.

Doug Mathews is an online dating expert and architect. His new passion includes building wood window blinds from scratch. He also enjoys writing about his experiences with blinds over at www.woodwindowblindsinfo.com.

Rudeness

Do not insult the reader of your profile by adding unnecessary comments such as ‘no time wasters’. Face it, anyone who has joined just to waste others time is only going to get more fired up after reading this comment and be more likely to target you. Ninety nine percent of the women reading your profile will not be time wasters. Also comments such as ‘no fat or ugly women’ are not going to get you any brownie points. This makes you sound offensive and rude, and will have the effect of making all women click away from your positive dating profile and onto another one.

Stick to the positive aspects of the ladies who you wish to make contact with instead. Always remember that these people are looking to find themselves friends just like you and they too may have had previous experiences which have dented their confidence. There is no harm to talking politely to women even if they are not your ideal dream date. Just by being nice to someone could make their day and it costs you very little.

Think Twice Before Boasting

There is a very fine line between describing your finer details and going over the top and showing off. No one likes people who boast and any boasting in your positive dating profile will immediately put women right off of you. Describing how you have the perfect body, the finest manners, greatest sex drive etc will come over as arrogant. Women have a lot of choice when it comes to choosing people to talk to, so ensure that you do not make any references to your sexual prowess, your good looks or your body. Allow them to make up their own minds, after all we all like and are looking for something different. So think twice before boasting.

Keep Past Relationships Quiet

Everyone has a past. However the online positive dating site is not the place to talk about any past relationships either good ones or bad ones. Joining such a site shows the fact that you are ready to move on with your life and are trying to find new friends and begin new relationships. So there is nothing more off-putting than reading details of someone’s past romantic failures.

Your positive dating profile needs to be full of optimism and fun loving hopeful comments. This will emphasise the fact that you are ready to move onto the next chapter in your life. So keep to yourself all references about your break ups, how your ex treated you and just keep the conversations light and forward moving.

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Today, numerous online dating sites are available in the internet where you can easily find the perfect date for you. But I suggest opting for a trusted web site which will do more good when you make the selection of your future partner. A person is a combination of virtues and vices in various proportions, but how much you understand about the real nature of your date is more important in online dating.

A professional online dating web site contains reliable information of the users and moreover, they respect the privacy of the users. The reviews of such web sites by the users who found their match utilizing their services are extremely helpful for the newcomers.

There are free sites and paid sites, but when you choose a free site, you must always check the credibility. The paid sites offer more facilities for the searchers when compared to the free sites. But still, there could be such sites that charge exorbitant fees. In such cases, it is advisable to go for the sites that charge reasonable fee and provide the necessary services. Ultimately, the site that you choose is entirely dependent on your specific needs. A variety of general dating sites and niche dating sites are freely available in the internet. Many of these have different categories or sections devoted to people of similar interests. The features of the dating site as well as the number of users can be determined by reading the reviews of such sites.

Reliability is the first thing that comes to the mind of people who search for their ideal partner in the online dating sites. Usually, a reputed site with ample visitors would be a good choice. Even then you need to evaluate their security system and see to it that they do not provide unauthorized access to your profile. Many of the free dating sites do not limit the users from accessing the profiles of others which in turn, encourages the users to use pseudonyms and other false details.

The online dating site you selected must meet your requirements like the facility to upload the necessary information, restrict the access to your profile based on filters and an efficient messaging system. Basically, the more success stories the dating sites have, the more appealing they would be. After all, it is all about the results finding a suitable life partner.

Bob D Williams has been involved in the SEO field for over ten years. Working in various SEO services but specializing in link building services. And in search engine optimization, professional custom videos and more.

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Finding their similarities is equivalent to determining their differences. What many people have asked them is whether the entity of platonic friendship is also an alternative for person of the opposite sex. This is also an issue that faces many during dating instances where it might crop up any minute. The thing about friendship is that if you really care about a person, you have to aid the individual in his/her time of need. When we share thoughts and issues with an individual, they are then our good friends.

A good friend will be your backup in times of hardships and emergencies. It is in fact, our best friends who discover our lonely nature and make arrangements for us to meet their friends. We build good dating relationships that have the greatest chances of making it big. You will also find out that you are always expecting your best friend to understand you once you begin acting in a specific way. You don’t feel under any obligation to explain a situation or anything else to your good friend.

The intimate dating relationship you have and the strength of your friendship is understood well by your good friend. Our friends automatically understand us without much problem. The part of love in a relationship is different from what friendship and dating entail. In a relationship with deep love holding the reins, the sharing takes a novel meaning. The fact is that love transcends each tenet of friendship. Love makes us to be attracted and attached to only one person, while friendship can bring into the equation so many people.

A dating relationship that has people loving each other in a very pious way makes sure that there is great pain on the person who finds his lover hurting. Love does in a way involve a physical kind of element. This is something that friendship lacks. This is the greatest difference between friendship and love. Nature does bring forth love to the myriad species so that nurture can continue while nature fails to offer humans with the act of friendship.

When you are about to go to a dating spree with your friend, the beats of your heart never increase in their anticipation of the meeting. However the reverse is true when you are meeting a lover. You are bound to do all this and others if the need be. Love and friendship cannot be equal, yet they all have love.

Written by Francis K. Githinji.

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